Friday night is movie night in our home. My five young children eagerly await for me to return home from work to eat dinner and start the show.
Yes movies are screens — and yes, they allow limited talking — but when watched together they offer something valuable: a shared experience that creates connection.
Still, I have been guilty, more than once, of not fully sharing the experience with my children.
While the movie plays, I have found myself checking my phone, sending messages, or working on something else. And when I do that, I stop being part of the shared experience. I check out, not just of the movie, but of being with them.
As DADS™ we strive to teach our children by example. That’s why I am recommitting to being fully present; even during something simple like movies with my family.
Now of course there may be times when we genuinely need to respond to something or work on a task.
When these moments happen they offer us the opportunity to communicate the what, why, and how long we will be stepping away — so that our children don’t see us as “checking out” but using screens with purpose.
When we communicate our purpose, and that purpose is valid, we teach our children that screens, when used well, can create connection instead of replacing it.
We aren’t about banning technology. We want to use it wisely, and sometimes that means using it together for learning and to create connection.
So let’s make sure that shared experiences truly are shared experiences by being fully present.
From my home,
Matthew
Founder, DADS™— Dads Against Devices™
Our pledge.
I will not provide my children with a smartphone or social media access until they become adults. Nor will I allow unlimited, unrestricted or unmonitored access to the internet, streaming services, gaming, or screens in our home. Instead, I will lead my family — by example and instruction — to be present, build relationships, strengthen the body, and nurture the attributes of love, communication, empathy, kindness, gratitude, humility, forgiveness, critical thinking, imagination, discipline, patience, integrity, resilience, courage, wisdom, and faith.